Ocean City, New Jersey – not to be confused with its noisier, honky-tonk counterpart down in Maryland – is fun, clean, affordable, family-friendly and alcohol-free (at least in public places). The next barrier island down from Atlantic City, Ocean City has been the Jersey Shore destination of choice for many wholesome, beloved Philly celebs past and present – Grace Kelly, Bob Clarke Pat Croce, Brian Westbrook and Ed Rendell, to name just a few.

Ocean City was founded by Methodist ministers in the late 1800s. Not only was alcohol prohibited, but as recently as 1986 “Blue Laws” were still on the books proscribing “dancing, singing, fiddling or other music for the sake of merriment” on Sundays.

Let’s not get carried away, though – OF COURSE you can take a Sunday stroll on the 2.5-mile boardwalk and sing “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” without incurring the wrath of the Methodist vice squad. But Ocean City – whose population swells to over 100,000 during the summer months – is still committed to preserving its happy, squeaky-clean image as “America’s Greatest Family Resort.” If squeaky clean just isn’t your bag, baby, there are plenty of other places where you can get rowdy (Atlantic City to the north and Wildwood to the south, for example).

HALF WIT’: “I don’t get it. For three months out of the year, these people live in Ocean City and behave themselves. Then back to Philadelphia they go, and what happens? You have a high murder rate, vicious sports fans, and aggressive drivers. Maybe Philly needs a few more Methodist ministers to straighten it out.”

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